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Enron Mail |
Willie -
Have I sent this to you before? < This is a good one, let me know what you think! I laugh every time I read < it. < < Once upon a time, there lived a man who had a terrible passion for baked < beans. He loved them, but they always had an embarrassing and somewhat < lively reaction on him. < < One day he met a girl and fell in love. When it became apparent that they < would marry, he thought to himself, she'll never go through with the < marriage with me carrying on like this, so he made the supreme sacrifice < and < gave up beans. < < Shortly after that they were married. < < A few months later, on the way home from work, his car broke down and since < they lived in the country, he called his wife and told her that he would be < late because he had to walk. On his way home, he passed a small cafe and < the wonderful aroma of baked beans overwhelmed him. < < Since he still had several miles to walk, he figured he could walk off any < ill effects before he got home. So he went in and ordered, and before < leaving he had 3 extra large helpings of baked beans. All the way home he < putt-putted. By the time he arrived home he felt reasonably safe. < < His wife met him at the door and seemed somewhat excited. She exclaimed, < "Darling, I have the most wonderful surprise for you for dinner tonight!" . < She put a blindfold on him, and led him to his chair at the head of the < table and made him promise not to peak. < < At this point he was beginning to feel another one coming on. Just as his < wife was about to remove the blindfold, the telephone rang. She again made < him promise not to peek until she returned, and away she went to answer the < phone. While she was gone, he seized the opportunity. He shifter his < weight to one leg and let it go. It was not only loud, but ripe as a < rotten < egg. He had a hard time breathing, so he felt for his napkin and fanned < the < air about him. < < He had just started to feel better, when another urge came on. He raised < his leg and RRIIIPPPP! It sounded like a diesel engine revving, and smelled < worse. To keep from gagging, he tried fanning his arms awhile, hoping the < smell would dissipate. He got another urge, this was the real blue-ribbon < winner, the windows shook, the dishes on the table rattled and a minute < later the flowers on the table were dead. < < While keeping an ear turned in on the conversation in the hallway, and < keeping his promise of staying blindfolded, he carried on like this for the < next ten minutes, farting and fanning each time with his napkin. When he < heard the phone farewells, he neatly laid his napkin on his lap and folded < his hands on top of it. Smiling contentedly, he was the picture of < innocence when his wife walked in. < < Apologizing for taking so long, she asked if he had peeked at the dinner < table, After assuring her he had not peeked, she removed the blindfold and < yelled, " SURPRISE!!". < < To his shock and horror, there were twelve dinner guests seated around the < table for his surprise dinner party. < < < < < < < --------------------------------------------------------------------------
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