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Enron Mail |
Look what our competition thinks about us.
---------------------- Forwarded by Steve Venturatos/HOU/ECT on 06/21/2000 03:02 PM --------------------------- Angie Zeman@ENRON 06/21/2000 02:18 PM To: Steve Venturatos/HOU/ECT@ECT cc: Subject: Reliant's attempt at humor - Thought you might like to see (and get a laugh at) what;s going around! -- thought you would find the below "press release" a bit humorous............................everyone is always looking to bash #1...........and from the looks of the cc's, it has made a good loop around at both Reliant and the Diner. FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE ----------------------- Today Enron and Hades announced a definitive energy services agreement said to be worth an estimated $666 Trillion. In the deal, Enron will provide both gas and electric commodities to Hades' facilities throughout and under North America. John D. Rockefeller, former CEO of energy monopolist Standard Oil, is now head of Hades' energy management division. Said Rockefeller, "Obviously Hell has significant heating demands. While eternal flames are a great idea in concept, they require vast and reliable fuel resources. Enron was the only supplier willing to make a deal with my boss, and, as a former monopolist, I just like the way they do business." A spokesperson for Enron said the two cultures were able to work easily together during negotiations. According to the company, "The deal fits both companies exceptionally well. With Hades' ability to attract and retain new customers, we see this as a fabulous growth opportunity for millennia to come." According to several energy industry insiders, Hades' high heating demand with very little need for summer air conditioning make it a very attractive energy portfolio addition. Hades is a multinational corporation with millions of sites worldwide and approximately 173 quintillion customers. The entity boasts sustained high growth rates over the last two thousand years. Enron is one of the world's leading energy and communications companies. The company owns approximately $37 billion in energy and communications assets. Enron ranks in the top quarter of Fortune's "Best 100 Companies to Work For if You Can Keep A Job There and Don't Mind Working 80 Hours A Week," and is among the most respected corporations in America, as ranked by customers with respect-us-or-get-curtailed clauses in their energy supply contracts.
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