A Luv poam

This is just about my intelluctual speed.

Collards is green, my dog's name is Blue
and I'm so lucky to have a sweet thang like you.
Yer hair is like cornsilk a-flappin in the breeze,
Softer than Blue's and without all them fleas.
You move like the bass which excite me in May.
You ain't got no scales but I luv you anyway.
Ye're as satisfy'n as okry jist a-fry'n in the pan.
Ye're as fragrant as "snuff" right out of the can.
You got some a yer teeth, for which I am proud;
I hold my head high when we're in a crowd.
On special occasions, when you shave under yer arms,
well, I'm in hawg heaven, and awed by yer charms.
Still them fellers at work,they all want to know,
What I did to deserve such a purdy, young doe.
Like a good roll of duct tape ye're there fer yer man,
To patch up life's troubles and to fix what you can.
Ye're as cute as a junebug a-buzzin' overhead.
Not like them mean far ants dun found in my bed.
Cut from the best cloth like a plaid flannel shirt,
You spark up my life like a load of fresh dirt.
When you hold me real tight like a padded gunrack,
My life is complete;there ain't nuthin' I lack.
Yer complexion is perfect like the best vinyl sidin'.
Cuz despite all them years,yer age, yup it keeps hidin'.

Me 'n' you's like a Moon Pie with a RC cold drank,
We two go together like a skunk goes with stank.

Some men, they buy chocolate fer Valentine's Day;
They git it at Wal-Mart, it's romantic that way.

Some men, they git roses fer that special day,
From the cooler at Kroger. "That's impressive," I say.

Some men buy fine diamonds from a flea market booth.
"Diamonds is ferever," they explains, suave and couth.

But fer this man, honey,these just won't do.
Cuz ye're way too special,you sweet thang you.

I got you a gift,without taste or odor,
More useful than diamonds...it's a new trollin' motor!