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Enron Mail |
Subject: Americans
I am a BAD American. I like big cars, big breasts, and big cigars. I < < believe < < the money I make belongs to me and my family, not some mid-level < < governmental < < functionary with a bad comb-over who wants to give it away to crack < addicts < < squirting out babies. < < < < I'm not in touch with my feelings and I like it that way. < < < < I believe no one ever died because of something Ozzy Osbourne, Ice-T < < or Marilyn Manson sang. < < < < I think owning a gun doesn't make you a killer. < < < < I believe it's called the Boy Scouts for a reason. < < < < I don't think being a minority makes you noble or victimized. < < < < I believe that if you are selling me a Big Mac, you'd better do it in < < English. < < < < I don't use the excuse "it's for the children" as a shield for < < unpopular opinions or actions. < < < < I think fireworks should be legal on the 4th of July. < < < < I don't want to eat anything with the words light, or fat-free on the < < package. < < < < My heroes are John Wayne, and whoever canceled Full House and Bob Saget. < < < < I don't hate the rich. I don't pity the poor. < < < < I know wrestling is fake and I don't waste my time arguing about it. < < < < I think global warming is a big lie. < < < < I've never owned a slave, or was a slave. I didn't wander forty years < < in the desert after leaving Egypt; I haven't burned any witches or < < been persecuted by the Turks and neither have you, so shut up already. < < < < I want to know which church is it exactly where the Rev. Jesse < < Jackson preaches. And where does he get his money? And why is he always < < part < < of the problem and not the solution. < < < < I think the cops have every right to shoot your sorry ass if you're < running < < from them. < < < < I hate those idiots standing in the intersections trying to sell me < < crap or trying to guilt me into making 'donations' to their cause. These < < people should be targets.[AMEN] < < < < I think beef jerky could quite possibly be the perfect food. < < < < I enjoy watching high speed pursuits, the more damage the better. < < < < I believe that it doesn't take a village to raise a child, it takes a < < parent. < < < < I think tattoos and piercing are fine if you want them, but please < < don't pretend they are a political statement. < < < < I think Dr. Seuss was a genius.
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