What we teachers go through

---------------------- Forwarded by Matthew Lenhart/HOU/ECT on 10/30/2000
10:47 AM ---------------------------
To: Matthew Lenhart/HOU/ECT@ECT, Tori Kuykendall/HOU/ECT@ECT, Jeff
Coates/HOU/EES@EES, William Kelly/HOU/ECT@ECT, Jeffrey C Gossett/HOU/ECT@ECT,
Kenneth Shulklapper/HOU/ECT@ECT
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Subject: What we teachers go through

---------------------- Forwarded by Jay Reitmeyer/HOU/ECT on 10/30/2000 08:55
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Wiekierak <disney@hia.net< on 10/28/2000 11:22:29 AM
To: "Brian Planz (E-mail)" <penst8wx@pdq.net<, "Chris Yetsko (E-mail)"
<yetsko@hia.net<, "D'Aoust's (E-mail)" <mandml@eznet.net<, "Jay Reitmeyer
(E-mail)" <jreitme@ect.enron.com<, "John Springer (E-mail 2)"
<jspringer@weather.com<, "Mark Walquist (E-mail)" <walquist@hia.net<
cc:
Subject: What we teachers go through

Little Johnny In School
<<<
<<<A teacher asks her class, "If there are 5 birds sitting on a fence and
<<<you
<<<shoot one of them, how many will be* left?" She calls on little Johnny.
<<<He
<<<replies, "None, they will all fly away with the first gun shot" The
<<<teacher
<<<replies "The correct answer is 4, but I like your thinking," Then little
<<<Johnny says "I have a question for YOU. There are three women sitting on
<<<a
<<<bench having ice cream: One is delicately licking the* cream. The second
<<<is
<<<gobbling down the top and sucking the cone.* The third is biting off
<<<the top of the ice cream. Which one is married?" The teacher, blushing a
<<<great deal, replied "Well I suppose the one that's gobbled down the top
<<<and
<<<sucked the cone" To which Little Johnny replied, "The correct answer is
<<<the
<<<one with the wedding ring on,...but I like your thinking.
<<<
<<<Math Class
<<<
<<<Little Johnny returns from school and says he got an F in arithmetic.
<<<Why?"
<<<asks the father. The teacher asked 'How much is 2x3' I said "6" But
<<<that's
<<<right!" Then she asked me 'How much is 3x2?' "What's the fucking
<<<difference?"
<<<asks the father. That's what I said!"
<<<
<<<English
<<<
<<<Little Johnny goes to school, and the teacher says, "Today we are going
<<<to
<<<learn multi-syllable words, class.* Does anybody have an example of a
<<<multi-syllable word?"* Little Johnny says "Mas-tur-bate"* Miss Rogers
<<<smiles
<<<and says, "Wow, little Johnny, that's a mouthful." Little Johnny says,
<<<"No,
<<<Miss Rogers, you're thinking of a blowjob."
<<<
<<<Grammar
<<<
<<<Little Johnny was sitting in class one day. All of the sudden, he needed
<<<to
<<<go to the bathroom.* He yelled out, "Miss Jones, I need to take a
<<<piss!!" The
<<<teacher replied, "Now, Johnny, that is NOT the proper word to use in
<<<this
<<<situation. The correct word you want to use is 'urinate.' Please
<<<use the word 'urinate' in a sentence correctly, and I will allow you to
<<<go."
<<<Little Johnny, thinks for a bit, then says, "Yu're an eight, but if you
<<<had
<<<bigger tits, you'd be a TEN!!!"
<<<
<<<Beautiful
<<<
<<<One day, during lesson on proper grammar, the teacher asked for a show
<<<of
<<<hands from those who could use the word "beautiful" in the same sentence
<<<twice. First, she called on little Suzie, who responded with, "My father
<<<bought my mother a beautiful dress and she looked beautiful in it."
<<<Very good, Suzie," replied the teacher. She then called on little
<<<Michael.
<<<"My mommy planned a beautiful banquet and it turned out beautifully," he
<<<said. "Excellent, Michael!" <Then, the teacher called on little Johnny.
<<<"Last night, at the dinner table, my sister told my father that she was
<<<pregnant, and he said,** 'Beautiful,.....just fucking beautiful!
<<<
<<<*****************************************************************