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Enron Mail |
---------------------- Forwarded by Phillip M Love/HOU/ECT on 06/30/2000
07:33 AM --------------------------- Shane.Dobbs@fctg.com on 06/30/2000 07:17:07 AM To: bigb@sonet.net, plove@enron.com, jmjaked@mindspring.com, dobbsmw@auburn.edu, dobbswn@auburn.edu, beenemm@auburn.edu cc: Subject: FW: Rocker- Here this time -----Original Message----- From: Stevenson_Scott Sent: Wednesday, June 28, 2000 9:52 AM To: BIFP TRADERS Subject: FW: Rocker- Here this time < Subject: Rocker < < < < < < < < < The Top 15 Signs John Rocker Is Your Stockbroker < < < < < < < < < 15< Threatens to kick your ass for even suggesting that you diversify. < < < < < < 14< All your money is now in "catfish and 'possum futures." < < < < < < 13< Tries to tell you the term "sell short" only refers to Chinese < brokers. < < < < < < 12< You suddenly find yourself the butt of one of Jeff Foxworthy's < "You might be a redneck if..." lines. < < < < < < 11< All your money ends up in NASCAR, not NASDAQ. < < < < < < 10< Bitch slaps you when you want to buy shares in Mitsubishi. < < < < < < 9< The only way to get him to let you invest in China is to < < < convince him you're talking about Franklin Mint commemorative Elvis < plates. < < < < < < 8< When Wall Street has a rally, he shows up in a white hood. < < < < < < 7< He keeps threatening to punch out that Stuart kid. < < < < < < 6< His picks: White Rock Beverages and White Castle Hamburgers; His < pans: Black & Decker and Browning-Ferris < < < < < < 5< Dumps your most profitable stock after misreading it as "EGay." < < < < < < 4< Since "portfolio" sounds too foreign, he prefers the term "bag o' < stocks." < < < < < < 3< You are now the proud owner of a $400,000 retirement nest egg < invested entirely in the Wonder Bread company. < < < < < < 2< Thinks "covering your shorts" is something you do in Greenwich < Village. < < < < < < 1< He puts all your money in "Yahoo!" because there aren't any stocks < called "Dipshit!" or "Stupid Cracker!"
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