Enron Mail

From:barry.tycholiz@enron.com
To:'fildes@enron.com, fildesd@phibro.com
Subject:RE: How Our Economy and Others Progress (Using Cows As An Example)
Cc:
Bcc:
Date:Fri, 2 Nov 2001 06:17:44 -0800 (PST)

WOW.... I am positive that your beautiful wife did not sign up for hauling three rug rats( plus 1 dad ) around the back streets of London.... what have you done????

I would love to talk market conditions with you but I think we are banned from doing any work for the next three months while this co. continues to fucks with my money.... HACKS !!!

Although not bitter, for years I have heard the story about being paid fair value for a job well done.. and that my time was coming...( just around the corner).... !! little did I know that when I made that turn, some guy named Jerome.( take a minute to imagine) ...was standing there with a baseball bat looking to smack my head a few times just to make sure I knew I wasn't quite there yet.

HACKS !!!

-----Original Message-----
From: Fildes, David [mailto:fildesd@phibro.com]
Sent: Friday, November 02, 2001 7:44 AM
To: Tycholiz, Barry
Subject: RE: How Our Economy and Others Progress (Using Cows As An
Example)



Kids are doing well... my boys turned 1 in September and running rampant
around our house... the rest of the family including myself are scared of
them. Olivia turned 4 recently and has quite a British accent now... I
sometimes wonder where she came from.
Josee has her hands full at home right now and after a weekend I am more
than ready to return to the office for rest.
Markets have been choppy... my trading strategy over the past 2 months has
been very simple however.. as Randolph Duke said in the OJ futures pit on
Trading Places... SELL MORTIMER SELL.


Will send you a picture soon..
say hi to the wife for us.

PS- took some clients up to play Turnberry in September for a few days...
what a peach, you would have LOVED it...



-----Original Message-----
From: Tycholiz, Barry [mailto:Barry.Tycholiz@enron.com]
Sent: 02 November 2001 13:34
To: Fildes, David
Subject: RE: How Our Economy and Others Progress (Using Cows As An
Example)


As always, would love to... How are the Kids? If you have any new
pictures, pls e-mail. Our home address is ktycholiz@houston.rr.com.
Talk to you soon. TIC

-----Original Message-----
From: Fildes, David [mailto:fildesd@phibro.com]
Sent: Friday, November 02, 2001 5:26 AM
To: Tycholiz, Barry
Subject: RE: How Our Economy and Others Progress (Using Cows As An
Example)



hang in there Tic
PS- you and the wife should come for a visit soon... I'll provide food
and
lodging even

-----Original Message-----
From: Tycholiz, Barry [mailto:Barry.Tycholiz@enron.com]
Sent: 01 November 2001 18:45
To: Fildes, David
Subject: RE: How Our Economy and Others Progress (Using Cows As An
Example)


Pls do not restrict my ability to kill my career.... the problem with me
sending this note internally is that they would probably want to hire
the writer of this note to help restructure some of our outstanding
agreements.

-----Original Message-----
From: Fildes, David [mailto:fildesd@phibro.com]
Sent: Thursday, November 01, 2001 9:10 AM
To: Cross, Darren; Tycholiz, Barry
Subject: FW: How Our Economy and Others Progress (Using Cows As An
Example)



In spite of it all, this is humourous... I suggest you do not forward
this
internally however...

DF

-----Original Message-----
From: Fisher, Billy
Sent: 01 November 2001 15:02
To: Fildes, David
Subject: FW: How Our Economy and Others Progress (Using Cows As An
Example)





Feudalism
You have two cows.
Your lord takes some of the milk.

----------

Fascism
You have two cows.
The government takes both, hires you to take care of them and sells you
the
milk.

----------

Pure Communism
You have two cows.
Your neighbours help take care of them and you all share the milk.

----------

Applied Communism
You have two cows.
You must take care of them, but the government takes all the milk.

----------

Totalitarianism
You have two cows.
The government takes them both and denies they ever existed. Milk is
banned.

----------

Pure Democracy
You have two cows.
You and your neighbours decide who gets the milk.

----------

Representative Democracy
You have two cows.
Your neighbours pick someone to tell you who gets the milk.

Mexican Democracy
You have two cows.
The government takes both and drafts you into the army.


----------

European Democracy
You have two cows.
The EU commission decides which regulations for feeding and milking
apply.
If
there aren't any, they invent some. They pay you not to milk the cows.
They take both cows, shoot one, milk the other and pour the milk down
the
drain.
They then require you to fill out forms accounting for the missing cows.


----------

American Democracy
The government promises to give you two cows, if you vote for it.
After the election, the president is impeached for speculating in cow
futures.
The press dubs the affair "cowgate," but supports the president.
The cows sue you for breach of contract.
Your legal bills exceed your annual income.
You settle out of court and declare bankruptcy.


----------


Capitalism
You have two cows.
You sell one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on
the
income.


----------

Enron Venture Capitalism
You have two cows.
You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of
credit
opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity
swap
with
an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a
tax
exemption for five cows. The milk rights of the six cows are
transferred
via an
intermediary to a Cayman Island company secretly owned by the majority
shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed
company.
The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on
one
more.

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